Ugh...

My cousin H-Bomb and I went out last night and got plowed on syrupy girl drinks and Cuervo shots. Still too much poison in my bloodstream for me to think straight. We're going out tonight to do it again. I'm too old to drink like she does. I can't afford the lost brain cells. I'll be mentally retarded after this girl is through with me.

What a night, though. Finally met H-Bomb's friend Heather, who is easily one of the ten sexiest women I have ever met in my life. Seriously, my dick woke me up this morning to talk about her, and even after our long, heartfelt man-to-hand discussion, we're both still obsessed. Before the night was through I'd seen her panties at least three times, felt her tits and ass so many times I can't remember, played with her gorgeous nipples, and had a blast hanging out with her boyfriend, who made me promise I'd party with them again after we did a double shot of some god awful scotch that burned so bad on the way down I thought maybe I'd accidentally swallowed a lit caution flare. It was that kind of night. God knows what's in store for this evening. I'll try to have a new article for you on Monday if I'm still alive.

See you on the other side, Ray.